Unfortunate Adventures of Curtis Macintosh
by FedorasRcool2
Summary: Curtis Macintosh. The world's unluckiest person. Ever. From being bullied at the orphanage, to being him in general, to being sucked into a computer game. Wait what? Rated T for mild Minecraftian swears and possible future character deaths. No one is safe. *Maniacal laugh* Please excuse the poorly drawn MS Paint picture, it's the best I can do.
1. Meet Curt

**Enter cliché storyline**

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Oh. So you were expecting a happy story, because of the fact it has "Minecraft" located somewhere in the description? Well, you came to the right place.

Not.

Welcome to the world of Curtis Macintosh, where nothing is happy. Ever. Now that we have that little bit of unpleasantness out of the way, I suppose it's time for the main part. Allow me to set the scene. A young man, approximately fifteen is sitting at the computer desk in his adoptive parent's home, having been adopted about a year ago. Brown eyes glued to the chat box where he was exchanging conversation with a friend from the old orphanage.

"_You never did cut that greasy black hair of yours did you, Curt?"_

_"I'm insulted you should say such a thing, of course I have, just a couple hours ago, actually."_

_"Yes, but I bet you can't say when you last washed it!"_

_"Uhhh"_

_"_Anyway, I found a cool new game, check it out!" ,Providing a link alongside the message.

_"I should have you arrested for abuse of exclamation points."_

_"Just clink the link!"_

After clicking the link, Curt was taken to a strange website with a reddish brown background. After a download time of about thirty seconds, Curt was asked whether or not he would start a new world. Clicking yes, he was taken to a loading screen.

**_Creating chunks._**

**_Saving Chunks.._**

**_Loading Chunks… _**

He heard a distinct sound of boots hitting sand, and the sound of water. Looking around using the old-school WASD and mouse-to-move setup, he realized the game was made up entirely of cubes, he was very disappointed. That was until of course, he began to be pulled toward the screen. He began feeling increasing pressure on his ears. When he was beginning to feel like someone had pumped a tank-full of helium into his ear canal, he blacked out.

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**Remember the cliché story I was telling you about? It just made its debut in the paragraph above this. Also, I'm thinking of adding the ability to ask the characters questions. Of course, it will be me answering them, but since I basically know what the Characters are thinking…Yeah. I won't start until chapter three though. One last thing, sorry about the short first chapter, they will get longer I PROMISE. See you at chapter two!**


	2. Enter Anne

**And enter new chapter. Yay! Also, note that this general idea came to me by reading far better fanfics. If you want to read from a far more talented author, try Mellifluousness, , or Flymoonflygon. **

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Curtis felt a cool, damp tablecloth on his forehead. He slowly opened his eyes, blinking away the sleep. He was in a warm cot with thick wool sheets. Feeling very nauseous, he attempted to get up and try to walk around. He managed to get two centimeters off the pillow before he nearly fainted again.

"Ah, you're awake. I've been wanting to ask ever since I found you passed out on my doorstep, _who in the Nether are you?!_" he heard a female voice exclaim.

He looked over to his right, past a desk and cluttered bookshelf, was a girl of around eighteen years with black hair and brown eyes. Then he realized that everything was made of cubes… Was I in Minecraft?

"I'd answer that, if I knew what in creation the Nether was."

"You don't know what the Nether is? The demon-world where Herobrine resides?"

"Who the – never mind, I'm not sure I want to know who Herobrine is."

"You've never been taught this?"

"None whatsoever"

"Well, in the beginning there was the Void, made up of empty space and particles, and then Notch emerged from the core of the universe, a place called Sol. From the darkness of the void, he created Herobrine, his brother, and from the particles, he created Minecraftia."

After a rather drawn out story, Curt understood that Minecraftia was divided into four realms, the Nether, a world of agony and demons; the Aether, the opposite of the Nether; the Overworld, the "Real" world; and then there's the End, hated by all, it was literally the place where nightmares came from.

"You still haven't told me your name." She said after a pause

"Well then, if you are so insistent, I am Curtis Macintosh"

"I'm Anne King." She said, shaking his hand.

"Also, I have medicine for you here, somewhere…"

"Aha!" she cried, pulling out a vial of red liquid. "Drink it, now."

Swallowing the liquid in one swig, he was surprised that it did not; in fact taste like five month old milk, but warm brownies. After five minutes he felt better, not like he had before being pulled being pulled into his monitor, mind you, but at least he felt like he could walk.

Anne insisted he rested for at least another hour before he was up and about, so he spent the time until them studying the room around him. Outside the window was a flower pot with a candy-red rose in it. The walls were made from a dark mahogany like wood, and the floors, a sand-like tan wood, and under the bed was dark woolen carpet. The desk was made from a brilliant reddish brown color and was piled high with papers and books as well as other miscellany. The bookshelf was filled with works such as _**"How to Train Your Village**__r" _and _**"A History and Essay on the Tragedy that was World War VI**__I"_.

After the allotted time had passed, Anne had finally allowed Curtis to explore around the house. With her watching like a hawk of course. When he came across a flower patch, he decided to pick some, maybe put them in a vase or start a garden. When he came back around to the house, he couldn't resist, she hadn't seen him pick the flowers, and it would be a nice way to repay her for helping him.

So after setting the flower bundle (it was hardly a bouquet) down on the doorstep when she was not looking, then running, well more like hobbling, away, he decided to explore around the woods.

He was too late to hear the hiss….

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**C-C-C-C-C-CLIFFHANGER! I know right now most of you are screaming curses at me. Please continue to do so, I feed off of them. Also, this chapter was 300 words longer than the last one! Yay! And credit to my wonderful beta reader, . Seriously, their story is much better than mine. Well, now that many of you are swearing at me, bye!**


	3. After the Flash

**This chapter will be from Anne's point of view, considering that Curt is unconscious…Again… Anyway, this is when character questions start. Yay!**

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Anne was walking towards the door; Curt needed another dose of Healing Potion. Noticing something colorful near the doorstep, she stopped to investigate. A bundle of about seven or eight flowers was sitting on the ground.

?

Picking flowers was illegal ever since Steve had taken power as dictator….. Nobody was stupid enough to disobey Steve. No one but….

"_CURTIS!"_

All of the sudden, the were several loud pops and a astounding explosion rocked the earth. A creeper explosion?

Rushing over to the ensuing column of smoke, she found a burned and battered Curtis in a rather large crater. Unconscious. Again.

Sighing, she held onto his arms and dragged him back towards the house…

**_Day 6574:_**

**_I've stayed alive until my eighteenth birthday. Hallelujah. After consuming a rather pitiful cake that was made by the baker, who is one of the nicest people in the village, I went outside for some fresh air. For some reason it seems Notch became angry with me and put some random unconscious guy on my doorstep. "Happy birthday, have a half-dead guy and make sure you don't have to bury him!"_**

**_After getting him conscious again he insisted he went outside and walked around. Giving in to his puppy-dog like face, I let him go outside and…. do whatever it is he does that nearly gets him killed. Of course he goes and picks flowers, which is ILLEGAL, and then gets himself Creeper'd in the woods. Right now he's lying down in the office. It's time for his Medicine so I have to go for now._**

**_~ Anne_**

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**Mrgh. I hate you Winston. Winston is my writer's block. He is responsible for the general crappiness of this chapter. Oh well. Onto questions.**

**To Herobrine: How do you feel that Curtis doesn't know you?**

**Herobrine: It's forgivable, but annoying. Gotta go relieve some stress. *Smites a random village***

**To Anne: How did you get into Minecraft?**

**Anne: I was born here…?**

**To Flower Bundle: Are you sad you're not a bouquet?**

**Bundle: YES! IT's HORRIBLE! SOMEONE FEED ME TO A COW!**

**To Inevitable Creeper: Y U SUCH A CREEPER?!**

**Inevitable Creeper: SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSssssssss**

**To Curtis: What's up.**

**Curtis: Unconsciousness.**


	4. Journal Entries 1

**A series of journal entries by Anne during Curt's recovery, ****if he recovers that is. **

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**_Day 6580 _**

**_I'm worried about Curt now. He's been out cold for four days is a row. The potion brewery workers have been working with me to try to get some kind of medicine or ointment to help him, but his burns are getting infected. Notch to the Nether! He's screaming now! I hope the herbalists bring that soothing ointment soon or I'll cry._**

**_Day 6581_**

**_What a stupid thing to do, it won't make him feel any better. Remember the flowers on the doorstep? I saw them and felt so upset about ignoring his gift, that I put them in a vase in the office he's staying in._**

**_Day 6584_**

**_The burns he has are deeper than originally thought. That's all I can write for now, I feel sick. ._**

**_Yesterday the village barber came home from Helßgatt in the North Jotlund. He insisted to examining Curtis's burns. After seeing the severity he asked to check how deep it was, the only way of doing so was making a small incision with a scalpel. The burns went all the way down to the top of the Dermis layer. _**

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**All I'm writing for now. I'm sick so I get to upload faster on the bright side. But of the downside I feel bloody horrible. Anyway, no questions today. ):**


	5. Important Announcement

Sorry guys, in case you haven't realized on your own, I'm going to put this story on indefinite hold until I'm inspired with something. I don't want to pump out crap simply to put something out. Until I can write a chapter containing wit and humour, I shall not put anything out. Thank you for your understanding.


End file.
